Marriage

April 29, 2014
00.00

I can't believe I'm writing at midnight. About marriage. Haha..
One of my high school friends is getting married this June. Wow. Surprising. I knew about this like some weeks ago, actually. But it's still shocking when I see the Facebook invitation. I don't know how shocking it would be when I receive the actual invitation.

Talking about marriage, I actually never really thought about it. Yes, I already thought of having sunflowers as my bouquet, or wearing a beautiful long white dress it can take people's breath away, or the yellow dresses for the bridesmaids, or those songs I want at my wedding. But... well, that's a wedding. And a wedding is much different from marriage.

I always thought "I'm 20, there's nothing to worry about besides my school tasks, exams, and my organization matters.." But hey, my friend is also 20. And she's about to settle down. Wow. That's huge.

Maybe she's already done something big in her life. But me? I haven't. I guess that's enough reason not to settle down yet. What if I want to climb a mountain? Or do bungee jumping? Or try to fly a plane? Or jump off the cliff? Or go backpacking with my girlfriends? What would my future husband think about that when I leave him all month, or even year? What would I think? I must be freaking worried about him and I wouldn't be able to enjoy my trip. And if I stay with him, I wouldn't get anything. That would suck. Well, maybe I should find someone who's as crazy and out-of-mind as me. ;)

Anyway, I read this line in one of Ika Natassa's novels:
"Marriage equals work. It doesn't just happen. There will never be anyone whom we can call a perfect match."

I think it's true. I never found someone who doesn't have weakness or something that you hate so much it pisses you off. But then again, somehow you can live with that.

I want someone whom, when he ask me to get married, I would be thinking, "My soul saw you and it kind of went "Hey, there you are. I've been looking for you!"" and "I guess my life will never be boring since you" and "For the first time in my life, I know I'm about to make a right decision."

But right now, I think I'm just like this: