Nostalgic

Looking back to my older posts, I realized that I posted too much feelings hahaha

It’s not that it’s bad, I know it was who I am back then. But I’m trying to be more concerned about it now. That’s why I deleted or reverted some posts to drafts if it's too melancholic or if the pictures don’t show anymore.

My first post was in 2010. Wow, it’s like 6 years ago. The high-school version of me who thinks too much, overjoyed, and very unstable. There are so many things have changed over the past 6 years.

I wrote about how I hate motorcycle, but then last month I met someone who loves motorcycle so much that I think there’s nothing wrong about his passion, it’s just different taste. Plus, I think I change my mind a little, I think I kinda like it :p

I wrote about my weekend habit of watching So You Think You Can Dance on TV but now the show isn’t available on Asian TV anymore, so I never watch it again.

I wrote about my ritual before exam which is to drink Starbucks’s Chocolate Chip Frappuccino but I don’t even like that drink anymore. I'm more into Caramel Macchiato or any milk-based coffee.

I wrote about how I love watching soccer, but now I’m more into make up.

I wrote about Postcrossing and how I love crossing postcards with strangers, but now I don’t know if I still even like postcards because I barely do that. 

I wrote about my feeling towards a girl (yes, I did, even though I never mention it), but now I think I was just exploring.

I wrote about love, love, and sentimental melancholic love. How I worshipped someone that I love so much. Well, I’m so over it. That doesn’t mean I stop believing in love, it’s just I stop expressing it with silly over-sweet words, and more into actions.

I wrote about how God makes me confused, but then again I believe He’s the one to answer all my questions.

I wrote about my experience in Russia but then left it unfinished because I have no time to sort all the photos to post.

I wrote that I hate the rain, but yesterday it was raining and I sleep facing the window so that I could see the water drops and the lightning. It didn’t really bother me anymore, I just have to embrace it.

I don't really want to delete all the whining about my past lovers (or anything you name it) these past 2 years, because they made me who I am right now. All the heartbreaks gave me so many inspirations to write and so many lessons to learn. It's not that you'll end up in my blog if our relationship failed, it's just... it's somehow a beautiful memory to me. You don't want to erase the beautiful memories, right?

So, to be clear, I am not the girl 6 years ago. I changed a lot. I changed a lot in a year, let alone 6 years. I don't want you to judge me for the sentimental, melancholic posts I once wrote. I want you to get me for what I've been through.

This is me right now. I might change again in a year, I might even change again in an hour, but for now, this is me.